Pauxatauni Phil...of Pennsylvania is the most famous groundhog.....Traditionally, He's brought out each year on January second, to predict the weather for the following winter.
His predictions have been about as accurate as the US weather service's so, he's pretty much been accepted as the official Weather hog. However, that wasn't always the case.
Virginia used to have a "Weather Ground hog." but tragically, it committed suicide in 1954, strangely enough, on Groundhog day......that year!
(Some say it was an accident...while trying to get out of his cage) But those of us who live in the "real world" don't "buy" that explanation for a minute!
Experts spent many years ...and a lot of government money (ours) trying to determine the cause..they never came to a final conclusion. (Surprise, Surprise!) But, not to worry...the government research continues (with their grandchildren now in charge) to study the problem.....
His, or her.....(They never figured that out either.)....name.....was Marmota Monax.
Of course, we don't remember that because most of us in the the "unwashed masses" class, had real jobs and other things to think about back then.
But Frankly, I suspect a "cover up."
And after some exhaustive research, I've come up the TRUE facts.
Marmota Monax. was BUMPED OFF!
That's right, Wasted...sent off to the home of the harp pickers in the sky!
The reason?
Basically the Government hates competition! Pauxatauni Phil has become the establishment Weather Hog. And that's that. The Government does not tolerate (if it can help it) competition!
At 81 years old, I realize that I don't have the energy to pursue this horrible crime, so it's up to others.
Perhaps a new government agency can be established to investigate....
JUST KIDDING...JUST KIDDING.....
(I don't want to give those ........ any ideas.)
-Ed
His predictions have been about as accurate as the US weather service's so, he's pretty much been accepted as the official Weather hog. However, that wasn't always the case.
 |
| Marmota Monax |
(Some say it was an accident...while trying to get out of his cage) But those of us who live in the "real world" don't "buy" that explanation for a minute!
Experts spent many years ...and a lot of government money (ours) trying to determine the cause..they never came to a final conclusion. (Surprise, Surprise!) But, not to worry...the government research continues (with their grandchildren now in charge) to study the problem.....
His, or her.....(They never figured that out either.)....name.....was Marmota Monax.
Of course, we don't remember that because most of us in the the "unwashed masses" class, had real jobs and other things to think about back then.
But Frankly, I suspect a "cover up."
And after some exhaustive research, I've come up the TRUE facts.
Marmota Monax. was BUMPED OFF!
That's right, Wasted...sent off to the home of the harp pickers in the sky!
The reason?
Basically the Government hates competition! Pauxatauni Phil has become the establishment Weather Hog. And that's that. The Government does not tolerate (if it can help it) competition!
At 81 years old, I realize that I don't have the energy to pursue this horrible crime, so it's up to others.
Perhaps a new government agency can be established to investigate....
JUST KIDDING...JUST KIDDING.....
(I don't want to give those ........ any ideas.)
-Ed
